I don’t think there is a person in the PNW who doesn’t dream of having their kayaking trip on the Sound interrupted by an orca or blue majestically breaching! To witness such a “kin-dom of God moment” is what it’s all about out here near the Emerald City!
Researchers have been at it a long time, trying to scientifically record the unique event of a “breach” and have especially focused on the why of it all. Why do whales breach?
The overwhelming conclusion is that they do it out of sheer joy…exuberance. They do it just because it’s a whole lot of fun!
A good friend of mine, Sheila Richards, recently wrote about this exuberance in her blog she calls “Monday Morning Musings”. After reading it, I texted her that I felt more like a “beached” whale than a “breaching” whale this particular Monday morning!
Her response was classic Sheila:
“Hearing from you has brought me joy in the morning! Do you know what a beached whale needs? Yes, you do. He/she needs some assistance to get back in the water. You know all the answers about how to take care of yourself, perhaps you need some of that today to get back in the water! For me? I need to go someplace where I can be absolutely alone for a little while. I like being near water, even the little lake near us. Where is the assistance you need to go from beached to breach? Oh my gosh, there’s a sermon title if ever I heard one. “Going from Beached to Breached.” Much love always to you, my friend. Sheila
I just loved the way Sheila framed the moment: “How can we go from beached to breached?”
It occurs to me that each of us is built differently in our spirit! Each of us is motivated to breach differently! Sheila needs alone time. A time alone by some water. For me, it’s a personal touch from a friend or church member. I get inspired by words of encouragement. I get inspired by group gatherings and retreats. What got me going that Monday morning was Sheila responding to my email! Her willingness to enter into dialogue with me. Her encouraging words. Her enthusiasm to create something out of my “nothing”.
What moves you? Do you know? What do you need to experiment with to find more about this part of you?
What I’ve found about “beaching” through my experiences both personally and as a pastor of a congregation, is that it’s so extremely difficult to get a beached whale off the beach. You can’t do it yourself. You need help. Too often people who end up “beached” (in a deep depression), wait until that moment to start developing a team that can help. The time to do that work is not during a “beaching” but before you enter one! Much of the work that needs to be done to pull you out of a “beach” moment is work that needs to be done when you are healthy!
Building a healthy community around you (a church maybe?)…reaching out and building some healthy relationships now, when you’re healthy… can be a true godsend when you’re up on the beach floundering and unable to move back into the Sound by yourself.
The beached whale in all of us is very adept at staying on the beach! When we are washed up on the beach, we can come up with a thousand excuses why we can’t get back out there. But when we have developed good friends and helpmates, those folks help us move through that much quicker than we would alone!
So this week, while your out and about, how about taking some time to build one deeper relationship with someone you know?
One of the first times I went to counseling I was struggling with my marriage and the counselor shared with me that she thought some of my struggle was that I was leaning too heavily on my partner. Cyndy was holding too much. The counselor looked at me and said, “The truth is that you are missing your dad. He’s gone and you are still grieving. I would suggest that you try to develop a deeper relationship with one or two guys your dad’s age.”
That next week I invited an older couple in my church out for golf…Doug and Mimi Berry. . At the end of the round, Doug reached across and patted my shoulder in encouragement. That little tap was all I needed. I was back into the waters again. Not quite breaching, but certainly working up to it! And throughout my years in Mitchell, Doug and Mimi became a part of my “beach” team. They didn’t know it, but they were an amazing gift to me and my family.
I hope this helps any of you washed up on the side of the beach these days. I hear you, my friends. If you ever want to talk, I’m more than willing to chat.
Remember, you don’t have to be alone. In many ways it’s a choice And I’d be more than happy to help talk you out of that choice.
Your friend and pastor, glad to be out in the waters with all of you. Brook
PS: If you haven't already discovered it, you might want to check out the TV show "Shrinked" on Apple TV. This show is the journey of a guy who is totally beached and how he moves from being beached to breaching again. Worth a shot! (Warning: the language might be a little rough, but worth wading through to get some good stuff!)
